Posts Tagged ‘couples’

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Anger Management for Couples

If you have problems in your relationship and are seeking to save your relationship at all costs then you will find tons of advice, books and resources on the internet, in book stores and from professional relationship therapists. For most couples their relationship is high on the list of importance and in most cases everything possible will be done to protect it. Everyone dreams of finding their soul mate and enjoying a long lasting relationship together with them. However as the relationship progresses, conflicts and unhappiness may arise and this is almost true of every relationship because everyone has different ideas and lifestyles.

Your relationship may reach a point where you are constantly arguing and fighting and before the relationship dissolves it may be vital to look for information and methods because no doubt you would like to save your relationship at all costs especially more so if you really passionately love your partner. Breaking up in a relationship is painful to both partners and the consequences can affect both very deeply. In some cases simple problems that are easily solved otherwise, can be blown hugely out of proportion and blame may be thrown back and forth causing bitterness and misery.

Relationships are vital for the well being of every human and most will place great importance and value on them. A solid relationship fulfills your emotional and also physical needs. Companionship and friendships for some are the very glue that holds their lives together. Loneliness can lead to depression ill health and even death and suicide, so if you have a strong relationship that is experiencing conflict no doubt you will desire to save your relationship at all costs.

Having a relationship means being able to share your thoughts, feelings, dreams and experiences and this is worth protecting at all costs. The same goes for having the support you need through illness and sadness as well. Powerful lasting bonds can built in relationships and just as fast they can be ruined by insignificant little problems that became big ones because neither partner understood how they could be resolved or the process to do so. It does not matter which of you wish to save your relationship at all costs as long as there is a starting point. Breaking up a relationship will result in unhappiness, depression, economical instability and loss of feelings of belonging as well.

If you know that you as a couple are experiencing stormy times then and you both agree that you would like to save your relationship at all costs, then you should seek out ways to resolve your problems any way possible. The first important step that you should take is to find what the causes of your conflicts are. Through effective and understanding communication with each other you can find the solutions.

Every relationship will encounter difficult ti9mes when you will argue and feel pressured by many different factors and looking for the right professional advice is the first step if you find that a compromise cannot be reached.

This article discusses the nature of ambivalence in relationships, and the resulting dynamics. This perspective has developed over the past 20 years of working with individuals and couples, and noticing how these dynamics emerge.

Ambivalence occurs in intimate relationships when there is the coexistence of opposing emotions and desires towards the other that create an uncertainty about being in the relationship. It is our nature to split our experience into polarities, such as good/bad, right/wrong and emotions such as love/hate, joy/sadness. One could say that we constantly deal with the opposite of our experience even if that is unconscious. As we become closer to our beloved and feel connected our experience is defined by the possibility of separation. Every time we say ‘yes’ there is a ‘no’ in the background informing our choice. If I am saying ‘yes’ to something wholeheartedly, I can feel that yes in every cell of my being. ‘No ‘ has been considered and rejected, however fleetingly, and my ‘yes’ has the quality of certainty. If my desire to say ‘no” interferes with my ‘yes’ it will be said with hesitation and doubt, and a lingering uneasy feeling that causes me to hold back; I am unable to fully commit to that yes. So not only does the opposite polarity define my experience but the degree to which I have integrated it into my consciousness will also affect my experience. Ambivalence could be said to occur when we are stuck between two polarities, and unable to reconcile them…

All relationships contain opposing desires at times; this is the essence of conflict. The degree to which both ends of any polarity are conscious or hidden will affect how partners deal with conflict between them. In addition, how much each individual identifies with one end of the polarity will also determine the ability to resolve conflict. For example; if I identify with being kind and cannot tolerate the notion that I can be unkind, the unkind aspects to my psyche will become unconscious and drain energy away from my ability to be kind.  I will not be fully present or authentic in my acts of kindness, and in all likelihood project ‘unkindness’ on to my partner. By being rigidly identified with one end of a polarity and blocking awareness of the intolerable aspect means we cannot be fully present. If both individuals in a relationship are identifying their nature in this way, then what they create between them will also be an inability to tolerate certain experiences and make resolving conflict difficult.

So if the nature of ambivalence is the inability to resolve an internal conflict that results in a lack of presence; a common way of expressing this is confusion.  Ambivalence and confusion can be temporary states in all relationships, as we take time to resolve opposing or new information. However, where ambivalence becomes a chronic response to the world, confusion can become a defensive stance that protects us from being fully present.  Expressing confusion habitually regarding what we want or need reinforces our sense of helplessness. ‘I don’t know’ does not give us a sense of mastery over our world, nor does it give our partner anything to go on. The inability of either partner to move forward in the relationship, either to leave or to move closer reinforces this helplessness.  This chronic pattern becomes a problem in relationships by inhibiting deeper intimacy.

A chronic pattern of ambivalence typically generates a dynamic in relationships where one partner is identified as ‘uncommitted’ and the other as wanting commitment.  Each partner will develop behaviors around this conflict in an attempt to pull their partner closer, or push them away. Each partner is expressing a particular role in the conflict over being in the relationship or out of it, but essentially both partners are creating the ambivalent tension between them by being identified with one end of the polarity.

In other words, if we were to reduce this to a simple yes and no – the two ends of a polarity would be, ‘yes I want more with you’ and ‘no I do not want more with you’. Partners are identified with either yes or no, and between them creating a stalemate.  We can assume from this that both partners have not resolved their own internal ambivalence as neither of them can commit themselves to either being in or out of the relationship, and neither of them in this dynamic are fully engaged with the other. Often as one moves away the other will express more desire for the relationship, and the ‘certainty’ expressed by the committed partner is a desire to hold on in reaction to the greater pulling away of the other. 

Because ambivalence pulls the individual and the relationship in different directions there is an atmosphere of uncertainty and unpredictability that creates instability between the partners. There can be an atmosphere of impending doom and dissolution of the relationship. Partners often break up many times, or threaten to break up. As time goes on the relationship takes on the characteristics of an emotional roller coaster where they alternate between feeling hopeful and breaking up.  Within this atmosphere, it can be very difficult for both partners to be themselves, and be open with each other. When faced with the possibility that it will end at any moment, anything that either of them believes could cause the relationship to end will be denied or held back. As each partner withholds aspects of himself or herself from the other, this creates distance, and thereby increases anxiety over the possibility of separation. It becomes a vicious circle.

Typically, the partner who expresses commitment feels hurt and rejected by the other. The feeling that they are not good enough for the other to fully be with them creates a reaction of trying to please them, in the hope that they can make their partner desire them. The partner who carries more uncertainty often feels guilty that they are not able to give more, and finds it increasingly difficult to voice their true feelings. They start to dance around each other trying to anticipate how the other is going to react to them and hold back their thoughts, feelings or desires if they think that the other will react badly to them. In this way the relationship becomes more and more dishonest.

Both partners are in a relationship that isn’t the way they want it to be, but neither is able to leave. This is the essence of ambivalence. The preoccupation with separation, either wanting more separation, or being afraid of separation from the other, is the foundation of the anxiety that the relationship sits on. This preoccupation means that each individual cannot rest in the relationship; it is not a place of sanctuary and support but a place of deprivation.  Even though there may be times where both partners can have fun and feel connected it is short lived, as both partners carry an underlying dissatisfaction that doesn’t get resolved. A lot of time and energy gets taken up dealing with this underlying anxiety and deprivation.  

From this perspective, the alternative to living with a chronic pattern of ambivalence would be to resolve internal conflicts that prevent one from taking action, making decisions, expressing how you feel, and being fully present.  Issues around connection, intimacy and separation are often at the root of an ambivalent stance.  To be fully here is to accept the fragility and imperfections of life, to go for ‘it’ despite the possibility it could be gone in the next moment.

What are the easy ways to a flourishing relationship that can make up for the couples?

As what I have seen the couples who are presently having their relationship, they simply like to share each other, but they do not know what are the factors that they have to look out for from each other. Perhaps, they are pretty new in having their relationship, and they do not know what can be done in order to have a flourishing and sustainable relationship that they wish they can have.

In this piece of article, I will explain to you what the easy ways to a flourishing relationship are. I understand that perhaps you can be very desperate in making the relationship happen to you, but nevertheless you will never know what can happen if you have not tried out for yourself. As such, you do have to make a first move if you dare to try and if you are eager to make a success. Well, here are some easy ways to have a flourishing relationship under all circumstances. These have to depend on how good you are to manage your relationship.

Firstly, Expectations- Expectations play a big role in a relationship. We expect and when we do not get, we are disappointed. We may get angry and if the anger persists, separation results. The best way is to spell out all the expectations. Point out whenever you feel they are not being met and try to ignore as many situations as you can when your expectations are not being met. The second point that I want to address here is simply this word, Gratitude- Express gratitude whenever your partner does something for you. Husband takes wife for granted and vice versa. People are forgetting the art of saying thank you. Why not make other person feel good? By receiving thanks, the recipient feels worthy. I am a good person. I did something good, so I am getting these Thanks. Why should we miss even the smallest opportunity to express thanks? It costs us nothing. But it is invaluable for one who gets it.

The third point that I want to share with you is the Happiness- If both partners decide, they can be happy under all the circumstances. Happiness is a boon. Things will always be going wrong. Memories will always come. But if we decide to keep ourselves happy, we can surely progress slowly to a state where unhappiness cannot touch us easily. Happiness is only one emotion. We are affected by different emotions – Anger, Love, Hatred, compassion and so on. What applies to happiness also applies to all other emotions. Emotions batter us at all the times. We are like a ship freely getting beaten by the roaring ocean of emotions at all the times. Once we decide, we can be happy.

Further up next, you have to test your relationship- There are few websites that offer tests and quizzes. Attempt all the quizzes on relationships and find out your answers. Ask your mate to do the same and find the answers. Compare your answers and try to find questions that were answered differently by both of you. That will tell you something about the areas your relationship may encounter friction. If you have done that, you will realize that there are so much things that you can do to make your relationship even better. Do not ever feel very stumbled and frightened off, the relationship quizzes are there for you to give your gauges and set the new targets for yourself so that you can better assess your new relationship level to a greater height. If you feel that you agree to what I have said earlier, do feel free to forward to your friends, relatives and peers around, or you can let them to visit this piece of article at my site. Your help and support is greatly appreciated.

I would like to suggest this point to all the couples, never ever stop communicating one another; always keep on talking to your love one, as they are considered the important ones who you would like to treasure upon. Also, the relationship would of course be made up extremely awesome as stay made up is meant for helping you to eliminate the break up in future. I wish all of the couples to have making up process a successful one and the future endeavors ahead.

Indeed, life is short. Don’t let another day go by without taking a chance on happiness. You will never know until you try, so remember to make a move today. It can change or affect the rest of your life, therefore, at the very least, you can try to come out something for your ex love partner during your weekend plans. With a little practice, perseverance and patience, I believe that your relationship could be enhanced with the tips that I have shared earlier. If you have faced any problems with your loved ones, do not hesitate to visit this piece of article again.

I really have a strong belief that if you can understand what I have explained and applied what you have learnt from this piece of article, your problems can be eventually solved and your making up relationship can become more stable and stronger. I wish all the best for your making up relationship with your partner. Do always remember to spread word of mouth to your fellow friends for supporting the decision of having making up than breaking up.

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When you think about common relationship problems, it’s a matter of being able to decide where to begin as there are so many relationship problems.

Perhaps for a start, it might be helpful to compile a list, and then expand on a number of these. This will be a random list with no level of importance attached to the positioning, and it is not exhaustive.

*Compatibility,

*Equality,

*Communication,

*Sexual Orientation,

*Trust,

*Loyalty,

*Sexual Problems,

*Intimacy,

*Connection,

*Abuse,

*Ending Relationships,

*Jealousy.

At the same time as I list these common relationship problems, I’m also aware there are a number of ways couples describe the way they see their relationship problems.

I was watching a program on The Oprah Winfrey Show just after I compiled my list above. I watch the show from time to time just to see if there is anything on the program that might be relevant to what I am doing.

On this program, as it happens, couples were asked to describe their relationships using just five words. The following words or expressions were the most commonly used to describe their relationship problems.

*Passionless,

*Lonely,

*Sucks,

*Boring,

*Empty,

*On Edge,

*Lifeless,

*Tiring,

*In a Rut,

*Indifferent,

*Stressed,

*Unfulfilled,

*Fake.

There are various ways this list of common relationship problems would be explained in terms of understanding them and offering solutions.

The expert on Oprah that day, had an explanation that I had difficulty understanding as a way of improving the situations for those couples.

Oprah was all in favor of what he was having to say, but I did wonder how much the people themselves understood the explanation, and how they would apply it in their lives.

If I look at the first list of common relationship problems that I wrote, and then look at the second list, there is one in my list that stands out to me that all those in the second list could be associated with. The word I am referring to is: Connection. Of course, several others in the first list tie in with this as well, as I will explain.

Just to clarify exactly what is meant by connection, my dictionary describes connect as meaning: ‘bring together or into contact so that a real link is established.’

It strikes me all those words in the second list, describe how there is no real link established, leaving no room at all for any of the characteristics of healthy relationships.

The way I see this fitting in with the first list of common relationship problems, is that in order for two people to connect in a relationship, the first requirement is there has to be equality between the couple.

This means each person has the same status, each is on the same level. Let’s not kid ourselves, as much as we might like to think inequality is a dead issue, it is alive and well.

In all the couples I have seen as a counselor, one of the most common relationship problems I have seen is what I identified as inequality between them. It created an imbalance where partners were on different levels. I have seen it so often I came to refer to it as ‘the same old story’.

Where there is inequality, or people don’t have the same status and are not on the same level, there is an ongoing inevitable tension between couples.

This invariably means there are relationship issues associated with relationship communication problems, trust in relationships, sexual relationship problems, abusive relationship issues of all types, and a lack of real intimacy.

All these common relationship problems are an outcome of inequality in my view, and it doesn’t need to be like this. The solution is really very simple. All you have to do for a start is to put your ego aside and look into it. You’ll be so glad you did as there is much to gain for everyone, and nothing to lose.

Going through struggles in a relationship is not new.  Every relationship goes through these little periods of tough times.  After you have fought so much and argued about little things, sometimes petty, you may be asking if saving a relationship like the one you have is worth it.  Perhaps, if you are married, you have already gone to marriage counseling.  If you are just boyfriend and girlfriend maybe you already tried couples counseling. Next thing you know you did this work to have a better relationship but the squabbles and fights came right back.  The intimacy problems have returned.  Maybe in your dating life you asked around for dating tips and tried some suggestions only to find the troubles didn\’t go away.

There are a few things to think about to see if saving a relationship like the one you are in is worth the trouble and work.  Even while the struggles continue, if you are thinking about separating or even getting a divorce, you need to take a step back and look at things even more seriously, possibly also getting more professional relationship advice.  It takes a lot of work to save a relationship but it is worth it most of the time.  Although it can be really frustrating if the relationship love is not really there.

A good relationship with someone is one where the two people enjoy being with each other alone and are content with just that person being with them.  Try writing a list of the people you enjoy being with and see if your partner is on it?  Do you still go out and have fun with your partner on occasion?  Can you see yourself enjoying time alone with them most of the time?

Spend some time to evaluate what you find important in a relationship to see if the relationship is worth saving.  In a good relationship both partners usually feel they are understood by the other person.  Do you listen to your spouse, girlfriend or boyfriend, or do you routinely barely hear what they say?  On the other hand does your partner seem like they are listening to you.

Is your relationship one that makes you feel comfort when you have gone through something stressful?  A relationship is supposed to be a place where you can go when you need comforted. If you seem to be looking elsewhere for comfort then you may have a problem, or be causing a problem. You should not be looking to find comfort ABOUT the relationship but be finding comfort IN the relationship.  Relationships like that are worth saving.

Maybe there were some infidelity problems in your relationship.  Not necessarily a full blown affair but the notion that your spouse or partner seriously flirts too much.  These problems need to be addressed.  Both you and your partner have to be able to trust each other if the relationship is going to be worth saving.  If you can’t resolve a problem like this together than you may want to seek marriage or couples counseling.

In saving a relationship you need to ask hard questions and go through hard answers.  There are many things to consider and splitting up should not be taken lightly.  Soon you will be able to discover if saving a relationship like the one you are in is worth it.

Christian relationship counseling is used by many couples striving to follow God’s will and seek His guidance when the need for relationship counseling has come. When your relationship is struggling it is important for couples to get good advice from relationship counselors. If you are Christians then it very well may be that you need to get relationship counseling from someone who has the same values as you.

The problems that you have in your relationship may be an inability to relate to each other for some reason. It could be due to more serious problems such as adultery, pornography, lying, or many other things. Whatever the reason, it is incredibly important that you seek a counselor to help you help the relationship.

The advice that you may get from secular relationship counselors may be good but also may not give you guidance that comes from God’s word. There are many counseling choices available to you that you can turn to before your relationship ends up over. The best way for many to avoid that has been Christian relationship counseling.

Many churches now have relationship & family counselors on staff and may also have a counseling center. They are able to provide many types of counseling services but are of great help in family therapy and Christian relationship counseling. They will not just try and help you solve problems in your relationship but will be able to help make your relationship stronger and draw you closer to God.

A good Christian relationship counseling program will have a counselor that will draw you and your partner back together and will help draw you closer to God, together. It will help you get your priorities back in line so that the two of you will be able to focus on things that are more important.

It is really important that you do not hesitate to find help if you are having problems. The longer you wait, the harder it will be to fix the problems. This is no time to be in denial. You need to get things back on track and Christian relationship counseling can help you accomplish that.

The hardest thing that you may have to face is trying to convince the one you love that getting counseling is important. It may be necessary to go and seek advice from a counselor on the best way to get your loved one to agree to counseling.

There is a lot to risk either way. There may be some things uncovered that will be uncomfortable to talk about but facing those issues and addressing them has to be done. You will also have to learn a lot of humility as you may find out that you are the source of some of the problems. You may also find out that there is very little that can be done to save the relationship but still you will have done everything you can to save it.

If your relationship is important to you and you are trying to have a Christian family, then finding a Christian relationship counseling program is of the utmost importance.

A lot of people go on a dating without even knowing what to do and what to say to their dates. Men go crazy over girls they like; they plan on something really nice for them especially if the girl said yes to a date, unfortunately, not all men can handle a good date. Remember that the first date matters a lot for the woman can already judge a man’s fate whether he is good enough for a second date. However, that is not the case for all women. Some women who experienced a worse first date sometimes give the man a second chance, luckily some men can pull it off the second time around.

There are dating tips for men to consider for their date to go well. Some men who do not know what how to date a girl often fail on sweeping the girl’s feet off, thus, a chance for a second time is sometimes impossible.

You see, dating is very important in a couple’s relationship. A couple can even date even if they are already together or in a relationship. In dating, men and women tend to get to know each other better, and getting to know your partner in life is a continuous process. Also, dating can relive past love flames that one would like to experience and put fire to it again. In reliving the passion or building the passion for couples, it is mostly the men’s job to rekindle or start that passion or the love.

However, dating does not always have to be about falling in love. Some dating tips for men go as far as getting to know the person only and not really forming the sentiment of love. Some men ask for dating tips simply because they just want to know how to properly approach a girl in order for them to get to know a certain girl.

For instance, there is a proper move that guys should make in order to get a girl’s name without sounding too arrogant and/or unconfident. Always remember that girls like a man who is confident but not arrogant. Women likes it when a man’s approach is gentle, also, a man who is sensible to talk to is someone a girl would want to have a conversation with.

It’s really hard for men at some point to approach a girl since not all girls are suitable for a certain kind of approach. On the other hand, some woman do appreciates men who are straight-forward especially about their intentions. Some men just wants a girl for that night, and some girls want that too, that their so-called relationship will only lasts for one night. Although some girls find that too strong to handle that if ever a man expresses his feelings such as that, they’ll find it annoying and improper.

Remember that knowing the dating tips for men is important for them to know the right moves to get a girl. Dating is not necessarily choosing a wife already, but dating may also lead to a serious relationship that is why if a man is serious about getting a girl, he should also be serious in considering dating tips for him to get his goal.

How can you tell if you are in a toxic relationship?  Here are some clues:

Your significant other literally puts you down (verbally) in front of others. While he / she say that they love you, their actions do not back it up. Your significant other is controlling, invading your mail or suddenly shows up at places you are, to simply check up on you. He / she try to make you needy on them. You have changed things about yourself to delight them.

Toxic people make you feel ill just being around them.  So, why would anyone end up in a toxic relationship? Why would anyone want to be with someone who makes them feel emotionally or physically harmed?

This kind of relationship has a series.  There is a honeymoon phase, followed with a blow up, next by a compromise, at which moment the cycle commence anew.

You are evidently in the honeymoon stage when you first meet a new partner.  It is not until they have sucked you in further that you become conscious that you are in a toxic relationship.  At that instant, it is already complicated to get out.

One reason is that many people in toxic relationships grow up in toxic homes.  As a result, they replicate the patterns of their childhood without even knowing they’re doing it.  And, they may not know any better.  Others believe they do not deserve happiness.  Still others find that they enjoy taking care of people.

But the first step in getting out and staying out of toxic relationships is to realize that you do have choices.  Often people who stay in these couples have low self esteem or suffer from depression.

Once you have become conscious that you have choices, the following step is to begin standing up for yourself.  In a large amount of toxic relationships, the toxic individual has trained you that when you have fights, it is most likely your fault.  Once you bought this concept, it can be incredibly difficult to whichever walk away from the relationship or situate new limits that can cure the relationship.

For certain people, working in therapy groups can be capable of helping them either get out of or redefine these dreadful relationships.

The good news is that some people are able to break the cycles of toxic relationships.  Some of them leave the relationship and form new, healthier bonds.

But there are also others who were capable to fix their relationship and stay in it.

The certainty is that there are large amounts of relationships that are able to be saved.  Every so often it takes a tiny space.  Further times, it takes advising.  But if the couple makes an attempt, it is possible to restore the union in a healthy way.

Firstly, you have to make a decision if the relationship should be improved or you are willing to walk away from it. If you can not walk away, you will never be able to repair whatever divides you.

Once you have released yourself from the reliance which is the fundamental of a toxic relationship, you can start off to emphasize what you need from the relationship.  Do not badger the other individual.  Merely say “I need your encouragement “, “I need your affection “, or “I need your ingenuous opinion”.

If you, unfortunately, would not get what you need, the other person should know that you are prepared to walk.

A strong relationship is a two way lane.  In a toxic relationship, the lane is only going either one way. You have the strength to modify that, but you have got to take the dominance into your own hands.

There are two good things about saying your relationship is in trouble: by admitting you’re in a troubled relationship you’re being realistic, and two the relationship isn’t over yet so there is time to fix it.  When I say “fix a relationship”, what I really mean is to make the relationship better than it was before it began to crash and burn.  All relationships have their highs and lows, but in order to have a successful relationship you have to be able to survive the nose dives.  If you’re willing to put a little effort into your relationship I can help you.

Let’s pretend for a minute that at some point in your relationship the two of you were very happy.  Wait a second, of course you were!  Otherwise there would be no relationship!  Something happened along the way to make things worse, go sour, go to hell and that’s how you got to where you are today.  The great thing about being in a troubled relationship is that you’re still in a relationship, and can fix it!   Yay!

Both men and women are known to emotionally or physically “check out” of a relationship.  I’m going to start off by asking you to relax, and take a minute to evaluate your relationship.  Make a list of pros and cons, and yes you do have to put the pros on the list!  No negative Nancy today!  List the things that you do/don’t like about your current relationship, then go back to the beginning and compare the two.  Hopefully, you’ve found something that can be worked on.

One of the things I hear a lot from couples is that they fight too much, he said/she said.  It’s a great topic really, grab a bowl of popcorn then sit back and watch!   My advice to both of you is to stop the arguing!  Lay down some ground rules such as no interrupting, and no yelling.  Amazingly, these two rules work very well and very quickly. 

Communication is important in any relationship.  If things are strained as it is, talking about the problem is going to relieve a lot of stress.  It’s important to remember to bring up positive things as well when communicating with your partner.  Yes, I said partner not arch nemesis.  Try saying something such as, “It really bothers me that you do (fill in here)… but I’m glad that you’ve been trying (inserting something nice) lately I can tell it’s been making a difference.”

Setting goals may help your relationship as well, but both partners need to be on board to do this.  After evaluating your relationship both partners need to set goals for themselves for the short term/long term, and as a couple (which means you decide this together) sit down and establish some goals for the short term/long term.  It’s not going to help either person’s life if the finished results of the goals list looks like the shopping list of Paris Hilton.  Hopefully the list includes items such as: spend more time with kids, date nights weekly (or monthly, depending on how much you hate each other at the time of the list), go bowling, start doing things as a team (i.e. eating better), a small vacation somewhere…etc.

I don’t own a magic wand, I wish I did.  But thanks to trial and error of my own, and my friends, I think I’ve been able to put together something that can help you.  We’ve all been in a troubled relationship at one time or another and what defines us is our ability to come out of it.  If you have a minute I’d like to ask you to visit this <a rel=”nofollow” onclick=”javascript:pageTracker._trackPageview(‘/outgoing/article_exit_link’);” href=http://www.themagicofmakingupstore.info>video</a> my friend put together.  Most of the people I’ve talked to about relationships in crisis enjoy this website: http://www.themagicofmakingupstore.info.  I hope that it can do for you what I’ve seen it do for others.