Posts Tagged ‘marriage’

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Life relationships are very important in fact, life is all about relationships. There are many kinds of relationships and most common ones will involve human beings to their fellow humans. Relationships can also be with animals and sometimes other non living objects. For example, men are known to have a rather close relationship with their cars. I want to focus on aspects of life relationships between or among human beings and how they influence our lives. First, let us look at some of the reasons as to why we get into various relationships. A relationship between a parent and child and also siblings is mainly involuntary. In other words, we are born into the relationships. When we go looking for love from friends, we are looking for the following. The first thing is love. As human beings, we have this yearning for deep affection and when we stay without it, we will never feel fulfilled. You also look for affirmation in relations. This is to say that you are seeking to be reassured and, this is pretty common in relationships of life.

In life relationships you will tend to look for security. In marriage relationships and other non platonic relationships, the need for security is pretty high especially for females. Apart from feeling love, most people want to feel like they have a shoulder and that they will be safe from all the emotional ups and downs brought about by the business of life. In life relationships, you will be looking for happiness. There are many people who are usually unhappy without someone to share life with. We were built for each other and in the absence of a good mate by your side, your joy will not be full; happiness might prove to be elusive. We surely have very high expectations in our relationships and, many people get what they are looking for. There are a huge number of people who end up disappointed when they do not get what they were hoping for in relationships. Let is focus on happiness for a minute. As you prepare to get married, you bet that your life will be much happier once you say ‘I do’. However, things may turn out badly and you become even less happy after a marriage. For this reason it is vital to think about happiness in a deeper sense.

Life relationships that are healthy will give you a certain measure of pleasure and happiness. However, it is vital that you evaluate yourself with this regard. When you are single or without a relationship, you should not be unhappy. This is to say that you need to evaluate some of the reasons that are making you feel down and deal with them. A husband or wife cannot help your internal issues and, you have to work on happiness before you are joined in a relationship for life. When you come together, your role is to compliment each other not to fill voids that might not be filled in your lives. There is so much more to say but, when you take the above piece of advice, you are bound to see the difference.

Venakteswarlu alias Venky (Venky) comes to the house of Murthy (Prakash Raj) on recommendation of Sekhar (Chandra Mohan) who is a child hood friend of Murthy and the father of Venky. Nandini alias Nandu (Aarti Agrawal) is the daughter of Murthy. Venky enters that place when Nandu is about to get engaged to software professional from USA. He helps the family in getting the engagement done smoothly. Murthy helps Venky secure a handsome job. The relationship between Venky and Nandu starts with hatred and turns into friendship. Nandu expresses Venky that she is in love with him. Venky, who does not want to spoil the relationship of their parents, decides to run off from the house of Nandu. But Murthy gets Venky back from Railway Station, as he thought Venky did not like the job he was given. And it’s the marriage time! Venky takes the onus of running the show of marriage. The demure Nandu is in shattered mood as her lover is acting like a broker to her marriage. Will Venky sacrifice his silent love Nandu to a stranger or marries Nandu with the help of their parents.

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John works long hours and Elizabeth does not feel he is there for her. Elizabeth spends all of her time meeting the children’s needs and John feels that she does not have time for his needs? Can this relationship be saved? Should it be saved? Here is how to save a failing relationship.

First, you must decide whether the relationship is worth saving. While almost every failing relationship can be saved with hard work, both parties must decide that they want to make it work. Because if a partner has opted out and does not want to opt back in, there is little that can be done.

Many people stay in a failing relationship because it is convenient or remain in a marriage because of the children. But that is not enough. How to save a failing relationship starts with a commitment by both parties that the relationship is worth saving.

Next, you must pinpoint the problem or problems in a failing relationship. One of the biggest problems in how to save a relationship is that people believe the symptoms of the problem are the problem itself.

For instance, many people think an affair is a problem that causes break ups. In truth, the affair is a symptom of a deeper problem. For instance, a lack of true intimacy can lead to a straying spouse. While most people look at the affair as the problem, the underlying cause of the affair was the lack of intimacy in the primary relationship. If you do not deal with the lack of intimacy, you might be able to keep another affair from starting through the use of guilt, but another problem (for instance pornography) could pop up because you have not dealt with the core issue.

When you start to deal with core issues rather than symptoms, you can save the failing relationship.

Once you have identified the core problems, you can begin to share your thoughts. This means both verbalizing your own feelings and listening to your partner’s concerns. Hold your partner’s hand when you are talking about your problems as a signal that you want to reconnect even when your emotions are swirling. When your partner talks about things that hurt you remember that he or she is not doing it because he or she wants to hurt you. Rather it is because they want to improve the relationship.

Once you have detailed the problems in your relationship, create an action plan to solve them. Then, take concrete steps on your action plan. If you do not spend time together like you used to, plan a date night every week. Take turns coming up with creative ways to spend an evening together each Wednesday. If not communicating is the problem, commit to spending 20 minutes before going to bed just talking to one another. And, then do it.

Finally, you should realize that saving a failing relationship is an ongoing process. You are going to take two steps forward only to take one step back. There is going to be both laughter and tears going forward. Be quick to apologize and slow to blame.

Is your relationship worth saving? If so, I have described in this article how to save a failing relationship.

Going through struggles in a relationship is not new.  Every relationship goes through these little periods of tough times.  After you have fought so much and argued about little things, sometimes petty, you may be asking if saving a relationship like the one you have is worth it.  Perhaps, if you are married, you have already gone to marriage counseling.  If you are just boyfriend and girlfriend maybe you already tried couples counseling. Next thing you know you did this work to have a better relationship but the squabbles and fights came right back.  The intimacy problems have returned.  Maybe in your dating life you asked around for dating tips and tried some suggestions only to find the troubles didn\’t go away.

There are a few things to think about to see if saving a relationship like the one you are in is worth the trouble and work.  Even while the struggles continue, if you are thinking about separating or even getting a divorce, you need to take a step back and look at things even more seriously, possibly also getting more professional relationship advice.  It takes a lot of work to save a relationship but it is worth it most of the time.  Although it can be really frustrating if the relationship love is not really there.

A good relationship with someone is one where the two people enjoy being with each other alone and are content with just that person being with them.  Try writing a list of the people you enjoy being with and see if your partner is on it?  Do you still go out and have fun with your partner on occasion?  Can you see yourself enjoying time alone with them most of the time?

Spend some time to evaluate what you find important in a relationship to see if the relationship is worth saving.  In a good relationship both partners usually feel they are understood by the other person.  Do you listen to your spouse, girlfriend or boyfriend, or do you routinely barely hear what they say?  On the other hand does your partner seem like they are listening to you.

Is your relationship one that makes you feel comfort when you have gone through something stressful?  A relationship is supposed to be a place where you can go when you need comforted. If you seem to be looking elsewhere for comfort then you may have a problem, or be causing a problem. You should not be looking to find comfort ABOUT the relationship but be finding comfort IN the relationship.  Relationships like that are worth saving.

Maybe there were some infidelity problems in your relationship.  Not necessarily a full blown affair but the notion that your spouse or partner seriously flirts too much.  These problems need to be addressed.  Both you and your partner have to be able to trust each other if the relationship is going to be worth saving.  If you can’t resolve a problem like this together than you may want to seek marriage or couples counseling.

In saving a relationship you need to ask hard questions and go through hard answers.  There are many things to consider and splitting up should not be taken lightly.  Soon you will be able to discover if saving a relationship like the one you are in is worth it.

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